Matt: "Nick officiated at my Father's funeral and got the tone spot on, helping to make it such a special day. His outstanding communication skills made the planning of the event a real pleasure! "
Rob: Nick conducted a wonderful funeral service for my father and it was exactly what he would have wanted. At all times he was very sensitive towards all members of the family and encouraged us to contribute. He was always on hand and willing to offer us his knowledge and advice before the funeral and was a huge support to us all. He was highly professional, kind and compassionate throughout the whole process and I would recommend him without reservation.
Roger:Nick was the absolutely superb Humanist celebrant at my father's funeral. Superlatives are insufficient. His caring, attentive, sensitive, diligent approach, from our first email exchange, through the Zoom meeting with the family (alas social distancing meant we could not all meet in person as Nick would prefer) and finessing iterations thereafter, to the ceremony itself, was everything my siblings and I could have hoped for. After the ceremony, everyone there - every single person - told me what a fitting funeral it was and how well conducted. Nick is meticulous, blending a high degree of humility with attention to detail. He drafts a script that leaves nothing to chance, fully according to the family's wishes. "The only rule is, that there are no rules," he said at the outset. We got exactly the funeral we wanted. It did complete justice to my father's 90 years of life. Nick followed up with copies of the script for the family to keep. I recommend Nick thoroughly, with evidence-based enthusiasm. I cannot imagine how anyone else would have done better. While I have no direct knowledge of his work presiding at naming ceremonies and weddings, I'm sure he brings his same high qualities to those also.
Vanita: As soon as we met Nick he put us all at ease with his professionalism and sympathetic manner saying he would arrange a funeral ceremony just how we wanted it. With a lot of discussion, guidance and draft proofs of the ceremony Nick arranged a very personal and celebration of life funeral. Throughout the ceremony I felt we were in good professional hands and a personal empathy came from Nick as he looked at us during specific readings.The funeral was well attended and many people came up to me to say it was the best funeral they had ever attended.
Charles: Nick carried out the service of my late wife Emi. During our time together talking about her it became clear this service was going to be the right tone with a touch of all that would be required for such a beautiful service with all aspects covered, I was not disappointed in any way shape or form. A number of friends came and gave really nice comments relating to the service & that was down to Nick 100%, he made the event what it was meant to be, a thanks giving of Emi’s life. A wise choice for sure thank you Nick for making a sad day brighter by far.
Margaret: I just wanted to thank you for making everything run so smoothly at my mother’s funeral last week. I lost count of the number of people who came up to me afterwards to say how taken they were with your words and the way in which you delivered them. The tone and your guidance could not have been bettered. It was a sad moment for us all, but one which left us lifted rather than deflated. Once again, many thanks.
Alan:
Thank you for your help Nick.
My mother was especially pleased you had made the effort to know some things about Dad that made what you said personal to him. And that the whole ceremony was calm and unrushed and peaceful. She also says you have a lovely speaking voice.
Everybody watching from the video link also said that it was a lovely and moving. It was lovely that we could extend this for his other grandchildren and his brother and family to watch rather them attending in person.
I would meet with you to listen to what you may have in mind, and explore possible options with you. I would then write an initial “script” for the ceremony which we can iterate together so that it ends up exactly as you wish it to be.
The ceremony could run something like this:
Arrival of those attending and the deceased’s coffin carried by pallbearers
Welcoming everyone and outlining what will happen in the ceremony
Thoughts on life and death from a non religious, humanist perspective
A tribute to the person who has died. For me this is the most important part of the ceremony: my aim would be to capture and celebrate all that was special and wonderful about the person who has gone
The Committal: this is the most sensitive part of the ceremony; there are many options which we can discuss
Closing and looking to the future
We can include readings and music, and we can involve those who you would like to participate in your ceremony, or I am happy to do the whole thing.
This is just a guide to give you a flavour of what we could do. As your celebrant you will not get an “off the shelf” ceremony; instead I would work with you to understand what you have in mind and then write a “script” for you – which we can iterate together – so that we have everything planned and sorted before the funeral.
Some people believe that a non religious funeral is somehow not a “proper” ceremony. I would argue that for those of us who do not have a clear religious faith, then a non religious Humanist ceremony has no “pretence” and is instead completely true and honest. Instead of the rituals of prayers and hymns which may have marginal meaning to us, we can say farewell to a loved one and celebrate their life rooted in our shared humanity. At the same time, we can respect those who may have religious beliefs and so we can build into the ceremony a moment where loved ones can say their own private prayer.
